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<h3 class="title"><a href="index.html" title="Fight on, Astroport!">Fight on, Astroport!</a></h3>
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<span class="author">By Jared Dunn</span>
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<img width="640" height="427" src="http://s3.amazonaws.com/assets.piedpiper.pro/app/uploads/2017/06/piedpiper_407_blog.png" class="attachment-post-thumbnail size-post-thumbnail wp-post-image" alt="piedpiper_407_blog" srcset="http://s3.amazonaws.com/assets.piedpiper.pro/app/uploads/2017/06/piedpiper_407_blog.png 640w, http://s3.amazonaws.com/assets.piedpiper.pro/app/uploads/2017/06/piedpiper_407_blog-300x200.png 300w" sizes="(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px" /> </div>
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<p>Have you heard? Our new app Space Saver has cracked the Top Five Hundred rankings! I went to the Hooli App Store, clicked the Utilities tab, selected sub-group mobile, selected sub-group storage, kept scrolling down to number 499, and there was our name in lights! Yet no sooner had I prepared to blast the Joan Baez and toast our success than we were hit with some bad news.</p>
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<p>First, there was Richard’s osteopenia diagnosis. I purchased chocolate-flavored Viactiv Calcium Soft Chews to show him bone density maintenance can be fun and cool, but still, I know he was shaken. Second, there was Stu Burke. This patent troll spotted Space Saver, an ingenue fresh off the bus from Iowa about to catch her big break, and he pounced. Luckily, our Richard was armed with justice and, some minor financial casualties aside, Astroport prevailed!</p>
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<p>While Richard was on the front lines of patent litigation, I was fighting my own war on the homefront — me, a mildly-scoliotic David, against Microsoft Azure, a corporate Goliath. How could I get them to reduce our cloud storage rate? Well, as Anna sings in The King and I: “Make believe you’re brave, and the trick will take you far.” So, I became Ed Chambers.</p>
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<p>Ed was everything I wasn’t: suave, confident, able to stomach hard liquor and dessert wines. While I always stay on the line after a customer service call to rate my interaction, Ed just hung up ‘cause he had a disco to get to.’ And while my dreams are a labyrinthine theater of repressed memories, Ed’s were just a cheerful replay of his favorite Super Bowl halftime shows.</p>
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<p>It was a thrilling foray, but in the end, Ed’s brashness was his undoing. He had to be let go. Farewell, EC — we may be back to the core Astroport team, but you and your colorful exit interview won’t soon be forgotten.</p>
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<h3 id="reply-title" class="comment-reply-title">Leave a Reply to <a href="#comment-340945">KP</a> <small><a rel="nofollow" id="cancel-comment-reply-link" href="index.html#respond">Cancel reply</a></small></h3> <form action="http://astroport.com/wp/wp-comments-post.php" method="post" id="commentform" class="comment-form">
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<li class="comment even thread-even depth-1" id="comment-340945">
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<img alt='' src='http://0.gravatar.com/avatar/6597aab3498c03df2ac8ab594ba59431?s=32&d=mm&r=g' srcset='http://0.gravatar.com/avatar/6597aab3498c03df2ac8ab594ba59431?s=64&d=mm&r=g 2x' class='avatar avatar-32 photo' height='32' width='32' /> <cite class="fn">KP</cite> <span class="says">says:</span> </div>
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<div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="index.html#comment-340945">
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June 7, 2017 at 5:20 pm</a> </div>
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<p>“Go for Chambers” is how I will be answering my phone from now on.</p>
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<div class="reply"><a rel='nofollow' class='comment-reply-link' href='index3a37.html?replytocom=340945#respond' onclick='return addComment.moveForm( "div-comment-340945", "340945", "respond", "999" )' aria-label='Reply to KP'>Reply</a></div>
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<li class="comment odd alt thread-odd thread-alt depth-1" id="comment-340921">
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<img alt='' src='http://2.gravatar.com/avatar/247c7fa8a33dd8051b79f3be34f44501?s=32&d=mm&r=g' srcset='http://2.gravatar.com/avatar/247c7fa8a33dd8051b79f3be34f44501?s=64&d=mm&r=g 2x' class='avatar avatar-32 photo' height='32' width='32' /> <cite class="fn">Anthony Riposta</cite> <span class="says">says:</span> </div>
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<div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="index.html#comment-340921">
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June 6, 2017 at 2:21 pm</a> </div>
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<p>R.I.P. Ed Chambers 2017-2017</p>
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<div class="reply"><a rel='nofollow' class='comment-reply-link' href='indexe392.html?replytocom=340921#respond' onclick='return addComment.moveForm( "div-comment-340921", "340921", "respond", "999" )' aria-label='Reply to Anthony Riposta'>Reply</a></div>
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<li class="comment even thread-even depth-1" id="comment-340917">
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<img alt='' src='http://2.gravatar.com/avatar/b0e0982d9a3ad847d7e77e1215399a5a?s=32&d=mm&r=g' srcset='http://2.gravatar.com/avatar/b0e0982d9a3ad847d7e77e1215399a5a?s=64&d=mm&r=g 2x' class='avatar avatar-32 photo' height='32' width='32' /> <cite class="fn"><a href='http://www.yeswelazio.it/public' rel='external nofollow' class='url'>Gabriele Caprio</a></cite> <span class="says">says:</span> </div>
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<div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="index.html#comment-340917">
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June 6, 2017 at 12:07 pm</a> </div>
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<p>This platform is great, not expensive! I love it!</p>
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<div class="reply"><a rel='nofollow' class='comment-reply-link' href='index3905.html?replytocom=340917#respond' onclick='return addComment.moveForm( "div-comment-340917", "340917", "respond", "999" )' aria-label='Reply to Gabriele Caprio'>Reply</a></div>
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<li class="comment odd alt thread-odd thread-alt depth-1" id="comment-340891">
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<img alt='' src='http://0.gravatar.com/avatar/cb8f45312016ff46a9cc4b509d8d8b4b?s=32&d=mm&r=g' srcset='http://0.gravatar.com/avatar/cb8f45312016ff46a9cc4b509d8d8b4b?s=64&d=mm&r=g 2x' class='avatar avatar-32 photo' height='32' width='32' /> <cite class="fn"><a href='http://hashmaster9000 productions/' rel='external nofollow' class='url'>Jay Hash</a></cite> <span class="says">says:</span> </div>
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<div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="index.html#comment-340891">
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June 5, 2017 at 3:34 am</a> </div>
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<p>I hope the ios App Store version gets approved soon! Sitting here with my crappy WinZip App. All it wants me to do is pay for it. Looking forward to your free space, though I’m unsure about what you need the partition on my phone for. And 20GB on a phone? Dude, that’s like 20 FLAC format Vangelis albums. Can you do like a quarter of that? Lemme know if you want me to beta test it though.</p>
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<p>Peace!</p>
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<div class="reply"><a rel='nofollow' class='comment-reply-link' href='indexe474.html?replytocom=340891#respond' onclick='return addComment.moveForm( "div-comment-340891", "340891", "respond", "999" )' aria-label='Reply to Jay Hash'>Reply</a></div>
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<li class="comment even thread-even depth-1" id="comment-340887">
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<img alt='' src='http://0.gravatar.com/avatar/396f19ddbde72a111840afa404d1187f?s=32&d=mm&r=g' srcset='http://0.gravatar.com/avatar/396f19ddbde72a111840afa404d1187f?s=64&d=mm&r=g 2x' class='avatar avatar-32 photo' height='32' width='32' /> <cite class="fn">Timothy Walsh</cite> <span class="says">says:</span> </div>
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<div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="index.html#comment-340887">
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June 5, 2017 at 2:12 am</a> </div>
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<p>Jared, you don’t need Ed Chambers, you are Ed Chambers. You can do anything he can do.</p>
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<div class="reply"><a rel='nofollow' class='comment-reply-link' href='indexf747.html?replytocom=340887#respond' onclick='return addComment.moveForm( "div-comment-340887", "340887", "respond", "999" )' aria-label='Reply to Timothy Walsh'>Reply</a></div>
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<img alt='' src='http://0.gravatar.com/avatar/651063f0bc54b67648aff8db9d6e93b0?s=32&d=mm&r=g' srcset='http://0.gravatar.com/avatar/651063f0bc54b67648aff8db9d6e93b0?s=64&d=mm&r=g 2x' class='avatar avatar-32 photo' height='32' width='32' /> <cite class="fn"><a href='http://blog.dnwahyudi.com/' rel='external nofollow' class='url'>Yudi</a></cite> <span class="says">says:</span> </div>
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<div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="index.html#comment-340884">
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June 5, 2017 at 12:30 am</a> </div>
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<p>Congratulations</p>
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<img alt='' src='http://0.gravatar.com/avatar/fa7b4ed97866871361d270fa068e1f57?s=32&d=mm&r=g' srcset='http://0.gravatar.com/avatar/fa7b4ed97866871361d270fa068e1f57?s=64&d=mm&r=g 2x' class='avatar avatar-32 photo' height='32' width='32' /> <cite class="fn"><a href='http://nope/' rel='external nofollow' class='url'>Kkkktcat</a></cite> <span class="says">says:</span> </div>
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<div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="index.html#comment-340883">
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June 5, 2017 at 12:16 am</a> </div>
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<p>Keep up the good work pied piper!!</p>
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<div class="reply"><a rel='nofollow' class='comment-reply-link' href='index942f.html?replytocom=340883#respond' onclick='return addComment.moveForm( "div-comment-340883", "340883", "respond", "999" )' aria-label='Reply to Kkkktcat'>Reply</a></div>
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<img alt='' src='http://2.gravatar.com/avatar/bc926f85dc9c342cdadd4815ef0c1077?s=32&d=mm&r=g' srcset='http://2.gravatar.com/avatar/bc926f85dc9c342cdadd4815ef0c1077?s=64&d=mm&r=g 2x' class='avatar avatar-32 photo' height='32' width='32' /> <cite class="fn">Matt B</cite> <span class="says">says:</span> </div>
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<div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="index.html#comment-340880">
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June 4, 2017 at 11:08 pm</a> </div>
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<p>I bet your unicorn tech finds profitability via gov’t contracts, porn, and/or money-laundering.</p>
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<img alt='' src='http://0.gravatar.com/avatar/929bc2f193eaf18b5e2b6edb6910b1cb?s=32&d=mm&r=g' srcset='http://0.gravatar.com/avatar/929bc2f193eaf18b5e2b6edb6910b1cb?s=64&d=mm&r=g 2x' class='avatar avatar-32 photo' height='32' width='32' /> <cite class="fn">Ralph Wiggens</cite> <span class="says">says:</span> </div>
|
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<div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="index.html#comment-340879">
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June 4, 2017 at 10:56 pm</a> </div>
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<p>Hella yeah</p>
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<img alt='' src='http://1.gravatar.com/avatar/77fef55686cde35b051f11ef52e5c50b?s=32&d=mm&r=g' srcset='http://1.gravatar.com/avatar/77fef55686cde35b051f11ef52e5c50b?s=64&d=mm&r=g 2x' class='avatar avatar-32 photo' height='32' width='32' /> <cite class="fn">Paul</cite> <span class="says">says:</span> </div>
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|
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<div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="index.html#comment-340877">
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June 4, 2017 at 10:48 pm</a> </div>
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<p>Way to go, PP!!</p>
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